The End of a Friendship - How I See It

Boy everyone wants the Bear claws out this week.

I will not respond to what you said.

I have heard it once before - from a bully, and a woman who was completely miserable with her own life.

Your words have no power over me because I choose not to give them power.

By the way, do not quote back to me something I have quoted to you.

My Best Friend. HA! I was blind.

I am so sorry you "felt sorry for me" and had to "put up with me". I wish you would post the actual "End of a Friendship". You know what I am talking about.

It is not Christmas so I do not want to play your Reindeer Games.

I have every piece of mail you ever sent me. The proof is in the pudding.

I am negative? I have blogged about how negativity draws negativity. Do you know how I have fought through so many medical issues and come out on top? POSITIVE THINKING. My Doctors have commended me on it. I have also fought horrendous anxiety and came out on top. Positive thinking. And I do not need a book to teach me that but I think you do.

As far as being a bully, I am an RN. That is generally not something we do. But aside from that, I am a nice person. People would not say this to me if it was not true. What would they have to gain? I always put everybody's needs ahead of mine. EVERYONE tells me I am the nicest person they have ever met. My REAL best friend knows the REAL me. Which is just what I portray, you just have the image flipped in your head. Like the movie projector that is your brain is playing the movie of me upside down so you are getting a warped view of me.

So I keep being nice because that is who I am. And I keep getting kicked in the teeth.

And my husband is here to pick up the pieces. And he warned me twice about THIS "friendship". He is always right. That is why I love him so much. He really dislikes people who take advantage of me and upset me for no good reason.

This time I am letting it roll of my back like water because I was not the liar. I did not steal your ideas this is something you have created in your head to make up for the fact that you have gone nowhere and I do not think anything will ever make you happy. You want to be the girl in the book people feel sorry for because she has such a difficult life.

Did I want to put this out in public? No. But you want to make me look like some horrible person and how "oh swoon" I have made you suffer so you use some words I have seen posted by you before but this time it is about me. But it really is not.

I will not waste anymore time on this. It is breaking into my important time.

I have a wonderful and supportive family, I have a great blog here, and two more. My first guest will be giving me his questions any day. I am so excited because this was MY idea. Keep holding up your protest sign, you know the one that says I stole your ideas, because people are driving by too fast to notice it.

Why do I let people take advantage of me? I need to grow a thick skin and put my foot down. I am not going through this again. I refuse to. Nice Mollydee has left the building.

I will only continue to give to those who support me and who enhance my life. Not give to those who are always mopey and complaining "It is HIS fault, it is HER fault, This is just my life, just what I expected"

So do something about it.

I hate to say it again, NEGATIVE ATTITUDES DRAW ALL NEGATIVE THINGS TOO YOU. That has always been how I have felt. I invite the positive in. I wish I had a third eye to protect me from people like you. This is really bad this is not typical me to say things about somebody else. I would normally think it was somehow my fault and not say a word. I have grown weary of that. It is time to move on.

I do not believe your lies.

And the funniest thing is you insult me and then wish me well. That I laughed at.

The End of a Friendship was nothing special. It was ruined before it was written. You just keep thinking it was all my fault. That is okay because Karma is a bitch.

Oh and do not bother posting a comment - like you - it will get deleted from my life. Or as you said "As of now we will no longer have communications".

This picture, as you can see, reflects a complicated girl, a beautiful girl, with NO mask. Her eyes are closed and she is channeling only good and positive things, making her world more beautiful and life more meaningful.

Two In One Week

Words are so hurtful.

I wish they would stop landing on my front stoop.

Who are my friends?

Friends I know do not act like my friends do. This seems to be a running theme in my life.

No wonder I talk to my dog so much. He has no hang ups and does not judge me. He has no hurtful words for me. Just a look that says "I understand".

I want to open up my window wide and scream "EVERYTHING THAT IS WRONG IN YOUR LIFE IS NOT MY FAULT!!!!!" That goes for everybody.

There are forces in this world that bring us together and pull us apart. I am tired of being ripped apart from things.

I am not normal. I never have been. I never claimed to be. But I am a human being with feelings. Do not dump your emotional baggage on me. I will let it go around the airport carousel and let somebody else claim it.

Do I have the same amount of crap going on in my life that makes me think like you do? A resounding yes would be the answer. But I rise above. I have said it a million times and will probably say it a million more - NEGATIVE THINKING ATTRACTS NEGATIVE ENERGY!!! This is a scientific fact. I read a study on it. So stop keeping yourself in the place you are stuck in. That is your fault not mine.

I am always on the move. I surround myself with positive thoughts like a warm and fuzzy bathrobe. And I have to say I have been through enough that has made me want to be a Feel Sorry for me Sally, but I will not allow it. My positive thoughts draw positive energy and positivity to me. This is how I operate.

Please do not make me go through this again.

I talk a lot, so my voice is often hoarse. This is because I am very outgoing. I talk to strangers :) I talk to anyone I can. You learn so much from others. I take the positive and toss the negative.

I do not feel like screaming so I will hold it in. One day it is going to come out. But for now, I will let others scream for me.

To The Man Who Thinks Blogs Are Stupid - open letter

"I think blogs are stupid so I won't be looking"

This is what a friend of mine for over 10 years said to me after I posted my link to here on Facebook.

REALLY??!! I am not going to use your name because I have this thing called RESPECT for people. You -up there on your high horse, always telling people what to do and how to do it. You have made me upset and sick more times than I can count. But I tell myself you are in pain (so am I), and you are alone so I let it slide.

But this is the straw that broke the camels back.

I hope you do take a peak here. I hope you read my next Facebook post where I mentioned my new book blog and that "If you are not interested, simply do not visit. I do not need to hear your reason, especially if you do not like blogs".

Yeah, you did it pal. The claws come out maybe once or twice a year and you got to close to the bear cave. So everyone that saw that comment from you, and my very next comment will know who it is directed at. And I know that at least they support me. And even if they do not they were not cruel to me.

Now lets talk about all the things you have done over the years that I have kept quiet about. Your crocheting, you letters that you send out that are pages and pages long, the groups you join the things you obsess about, etc. The way you break down people and pick them apart and leave nothing left like a vulture pecking at the last bit of meat on the skeleton of some road kill.

Your words hurt other people. You are mean. There I said it. People are a lot worse off than you. And they do not act like you.

You always correct everything! We are all not (name changed to protect a jerk) John clones. I bet you would love that. A whole world filled with people exactly like you to listen to your rambling about how no one is collecting their prizes on Facebook games and how you hate your job and how the other drag queens act. OOPS! Have I said too much?

Was this ever a friendship. I really question that now. Because friends support each other. Friends build each other up not tear each other down. A real friend would have, if they did not like blogs, would just have not visited. There is no Blog Police. My ticker only counts numbers it does not give names.

So while I have already (sort of) let it go. Let us see what happens the next time you ask me to look at something of yours.

I believe in Karma so I am not worried about you getting what you deserve. And I think I speak for everyone that has crossed your path. And you are on every single site there is but complain you have no friends and they keep leaving. You never see the problem is staring at you in a broken mirror. Broken like you are. You are a broken man and that is part of what makes you act like this. I would have liked to have known you when you were young. I wonder if you were always so mean. No wonder (names changed to protect the innocent) Charles left you. If you treat your friends like this, I cannot imagine how you treated your boyfriend. I bet he never felt support from you.

I will never forget those words you wrote. They are they for everyone to see. If I saw that on someone else's Facebook page, I would say "Wow that was a jerky thing to say. I wonder if he is like that all the time?" And then I would wonder why my friend was friends with someone like that.

Thank you also, for correcting my spelling and grammar when I wrote to you about a serious and painful issue. That was nice of you.

I want to say I think many things you do are stupid. But you like them and you are my friend so if it is important to you it is also important to me. And that much even I believe even children can figure out.

Your words cut so deep like a hot razor sharp blade. I can have instant recall of those feelings whenever I think about what I read.

Thank goodness I am a strong person. And I know how you can be. Or else, I may have given up. I may have let those shards of glass hurt me. But I did not.

If I was three I would say "I think you are stupid so I am not going to look at you!" If I was three.

But I will hold onto and let go of the anger at the same time. Holding onto it for recall when you want to know what is wrong with me. And letting it go because it doesn't matter. Plenty of other people, strangers are interested in what I have to say.

You are an aging, sad little man. You are pathetic at times. Nothing in this world is your fault. There is a name for people like you I just do not quite know what it is.

When my blog is popular, when I write that first short story, when I publish my book someday, I may say I do not know you. And when you ask why, I will pull this up for proof. I would give any of my friends the shirt off my back willingly. You can stand there, naked and cold and shivering, sad and lonely. And suffer.

Those of you that know me may be a little shocked at my words. There is only so many times you can poke a bear before it bear smacks you good and you are down for the count.

And guess what? If you do not like this blog, oh please comment! I want to know who you are. If you give constructive criticism kindly I like that. That is how you do things right.

You did not have to be so mean. Who would think 10 little words would do so much damage?

This picture represents how I feel. The black fallen angel. Maybe I am mean but I am really good. Or once was. 10 little words turned me into a dark, depressed, and angry person who is always an angel. You turned everything black. You did a good job. I hope you are happy.

Quote of the Day

"I am always impressed by the fact that even the tiniest amount of being listened to, the barest suggestion of the possibility of kind treatment, can bring such an immediate rush of emotion. I think this is because we are almost never really listened to. In my work as a psychologist, I am reminded every day of how infrequently we are heard, any of us, or our actions even marginally understood. And one of the ironies of my "listening profession" is its lesson that, in many ways, each of us ultimately remains a mystery to everyone else.”
― Martha Stout, PH.D

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Quote of the Day

"Anyone who has ever been addicted to anything—a drug, another person, whatever—can tell you about hell being a craving or aversion. Cut the chain of cause and effect (sensation-attachment-action-sensation-etc.) at the link of sensation before it reaches the link of an action that will reinforce attachment to that sensation. If you do so, you can rid yourself of the attachment to the craving for, or aversion to, that sensation. You will then be free from the suffering that'

Alathea Daniels. Fearless Puppy on American Road (also noted as Doug Rose as the author)

Negative Energy

Why do we do this horrible dance way too much? Why did a few minutes ago just occur?

He infuriates me! Snap out of it. When you think negative, you draw negative energy to you. You do not want to listen to what I say, so I return the favor. Yes it is spiteful, but necessary. I can tell you are not listening to me talk. You do not want help from anyone-that is on you buddy. You wanna pretend you are a martyr and sleep on the floor. Go ahead. You cannot blame me for getting up and walking away. Why make myself depressed and mad. You know what that does to me. Physically. I am trying. It may not appear that way but I am. I want to scream at you "WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME!!!??" I know most of the answer but there is a piece missing.

You also need to let go of the past. It is killing you. I know you feel like you are constantly reminded of it but that is a lot of you. Why do you think I smile and laugh all the time? I fill my mind with good things that are to come and I am sure there are good things to come. Forget religion. For a minute. You make your own energy and create your own thoughts. You are great 90 percent of the time or more. The rest I cannot deal with. It does not have to be like this. What is the answer? I think you know. But you really do not.

Please snap yourself out of it. For your own sake most of all. It is aging you way past your time. Sometimes even when you are having fun, you really are not in it and I can see that. Again, I will listen, I am here for you but do not drag me down with you.

I hope you can walk into Dunkin Donuts and walk back out. I want that more than anything. You know what I mean. And I hope it is permanent. One time in, and out.

It is going to work out and be okay. Remember how I always ask "Am I usually right when I say things are going to be ok?" and you say "Yes"

Well things are going to be okay. I promise.